Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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