It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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