Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
