In the future we'll all be gay
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
