Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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