Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
