your room smells of hookers.
And success
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Randomize
