420 ftw
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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