Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I just saw a hot homeless man
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
