Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Rock
Scissors
Fuck
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
