I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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