anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Randomize