but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
