So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
My liver is preforming stress tests.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Randomize
