I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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