dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
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