WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
