It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
