there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize