best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
