I hate all girls vehemently.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
