at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
