I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
