You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize