Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Randomize
