so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Randomize
