it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
