GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Randomize