He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize
