and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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