I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Randomize
