He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
