I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
