So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Randomize
