Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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