I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Randomize
