Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
