If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
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