i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Randomize
