wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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