It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize
