Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Having a random hookup so left but love u
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize