Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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