Christians are straight up FREAKS
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
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