whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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