Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
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