R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
