no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Randomize