thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Randomize
