he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
